Amy Gibson is an author, an Emmy-nominated Soap Opera star, ‚The Voice of Hair Loss,‛and one of the leading Personal Hair Loss Consultants and innovative Wig Designers for women in the U.S. She is Founder of CreatedHair.com, an online community providing elegant stylish solutions, guidance and support to women suffering from hair loss.
Her unique designs have been seen on the red carpet, served Royalty and brought peace of mind to thousands of women living with hair loss. Amy's exclusive private wig studio in Westwood, CA specializes in offering caring education, ultimate customer service and beautiful solutions for women and children with alopecia and cancer hair loss for over a decade, including over 12-years in-hospital with cancer patients at Cedar Sinai hospital.
Amy's new book, Sex, Wigs and Whispers is a clear-cut, how-to guide for living with hair loss, wigs, dating and sex while staying connected to your confidence and self-esteem to live a fulfilling, active life as a vital woman. It is available in through Amazon.
Amy Gibson's media appearances include Fox Nightly News, NBC Nightly News, CNN, ABC News, Entertainment Tonight, The TODAY Show, Good Day LA, The Insider, The Tyra Banks Show, PEOPLE Magazine and Women's Day
Dr. Pat: Now
that's what today's show is about. When you think you're battened up against,
yes, I did say that word, you're battened up against some kind of challenge,
some kind of thing that you think is not going to happen in your life, you want
to talk to somebody like my guest today, Amy Gibson.
That's
what you want to do. You want to stop and step back for a minute and say, wait
a minute, really? I can't do that. Well here's what today's show is about. Now
many of you have heard me do multiple show on this topic today.
As
a matter of fact we brought a young woman into the studio that open-heartedly
with her friends talked about what we're getting ready to talk about today. And
what it's like. Life and love with hair loss. And why is that important?
Because there is a voice. And it is the voice of hair loss.
And
that's what Amy Gibson is talking with us about today. The young woman that I
am referring to came in to the office, I mean excuse me, came in to the studio
and did a show with Dr. Darvish. Why? Because there is a voice that needs to
rise up when we're watching individual people that have challenges in life and
say to themselves, I'm not going to step down. I'm not going to be held back.
And that's what Amy is about.
Emmy-nominated
soap opera star, the voice of hair loss and one of the leading personal hair
loss consultants and innovators of wig designers for women in the US. And why
is that? Because you know what, some days you look at the challenges in your
life and you step up and you say, wait a minute. There is something I can do
and be of service to people. There's something I can know through my own
experiences and demonstrate why I will not go quietly into the night.
And
whether it is a teenager that comes on the show and she and her friends do
something extraordinary by all of them shaving their heads in support of
today's conversation or someone like Amy that says, wait a minute. I've got a
personal experience. I know how to talk about it. There's this word. There is
this thing. Alopecia. There is this thing that I want to talk about that many
people don't know about.
But
it is not going to hold me back. It's not going to have me go quietly into the
night. And I'm going to write about it in a book called Sex, Wigs &&
Whispers, LOVE AND LIFE WITH HAIR LOSS. Amy, it's great to have you. Welcome to
the show.
Amy: What a
fabulous opening. You do incredible work. I am so excited to be here.
Dr. Pat: Now I
don't know if you knew that we had done a show all about six months ago with a
local teenager who is the daughter of one of the most incredible naturopaths in
our area. And the story we did about this was she and two of her classmates
decided that they were going to support her as her hair was coming out. They
all did the same with theirs. And it was a point. And I wanted to ask you about
that. When I talk about that, how do you feel, Amy?
Amy: Oh, my
God! First of all I wish someone had done that for me. Because when I lost my
hair, I started losing it at 13 ½ when I was on a show called "Love of
Life" when I was playing the first teenaged alcoholic runaway. And it was
maybe five months doing the show.
And
I was in the wardrobe room, the make-up room in the morning and I would always kid
around with the hairdresser and he, so [0:07:36] put your head over to me. Brush your
hair. And he said, you know you got a bald spot the size of the palm of your
hand. I thought he was kidding. And then he gave me a mirror.
It
was so interesting. When do you really see your scalp, right? I mean when do
you really see that? So at first I was intrigued. And then I must have watched
some kind of documentary on leprosy because that's the first thing that came up
for me.
Dr. Pat: Yes.
Amy: And I
started freaking out. And there was nothing about alopecia. There was nothing
being talked about any baldness or hair loss or anything. So if there was
someone like me in the marketplace it would have made my journey so much easier
which is why I work so hard seven days a week to make everyone else's journey
easier because I understand all of the emotions and fear and confusion that
accompany this. So when you ask me how do I feel it's like, oh, God! The fact
that somebody would do that for their friend or their family, it just blows me
away, blows my heart.
Dr. Pat: And you
know what we'll do is we'll get the pictures that we have and we'll make sure
that you get a copy of that and also a copy of the show we did with them so
that you can have access to it for your website and to get the word out because
you're absolutely right.
Yes,
you and I get to see that I'm a bit older than you but we get to sit here and
we get to talk about life's experiences as they were delved to us and as we've
gotten beyond them and share the experience shrink then hope from all of that,
right? But wait a minute. When I was a teenager, no, I didn't have a voice.
What was it like for you?
Amy: Well I
was in the public eye, right? I was on a show. I learned acting very young. I
was nominated for the Emmy by the time I was 14. So when I started losing my
hair at that age, there were bald spots. And you could take cortisone shots and
it would bring the hair back which still exists right now.
However,
it doesn't prevent other hair loss from taking place, yes? So I did that and my
big challenge was to make sure that the minute I felt that little underground
or pimple which is what I would feel, I immediately got a shot there so that I
would have that spot build in in preparation for the next one.
So
I really had this game going with this thing. My fear was that, you know I was
brought up to be a pro-golfer, yet I kept turning down all the things that further
your career as an actor, all those golf tournaments, the PR stuff. And they'd
say, why? And they'd say, you know Clairol wants to book you for your gorgeous
mane of hair. There was no one with this gorgeous mane of hair that I had.
And
I'd say, oh, you know yes, I'm using this other thing from Europe and I don't
think that would be, I'm really loyal to this company. It would be difficult
for me to say I use Clairol when I don't. I got out of that one.
When
they would want me to book me I would be so scared that the wind would blow and
you'd see my bald spots even if I were wearing hat. Can't cover up everything
with by my nape, some of them. But I would keep on making excuses until they
finally got discouraged to book me.
So
for me it was always finding ways around and thinking three steps ahead. That
was my main challenge even when I went dancing because I studied dance for a
long time.
Boy,
I had it down. I tell you. I did the headband. I've done ways to cover them. It
was constant, constant work for me. So it was always walking a tight rope for
me when I was younger.
Dr. Pat: Wow! This
is really part of the conversation hereon today for everybody tuning in to the
show. It's what is it that we can learn from each other about the walk of
courage that maybe, maybe, maybe some of us in life might have to take?
And
what it is about Amy who has now come forth then is talking about having this
voice in the world that is so inspirational in a world we live in where we're
so afraid of not looking right, not being right, not wearing the right clothes,
not showing up with the right backpack?
What's
the message we want to leave in the world for our children and generations to
come? We're going to take a short break. When we come back we're going to talk
Amy, Amy Gibson, about this and way much more. Stay tuned, folks. We'll be
right back with the show.
Hey,
everybody. Welcome back. It is so great to have you all. Tune us in, turn us
on. It is such an honor to be here with all of you on the Dr. Pat Show
Transformation Talk Radio.
I
don't even know how you're listening to the show right now. Many of you have
been emailing us telling us where the show is being heard. And we're grateful
for people that pick it up because we have a special place on our website that
says if you like what we're doing, play it.
Thank
you all for all of that. And it's kind of like an opening to talking with Amy
Gibson here, the voice of hair loss. If you like it, play it. And this is what
we're talking about today.
What
is it that the message is in the world today? How can we have a voice? But how
can we have a voice about something that many, many people are really struggling
with? And how do we take it to the forefront without shame, without guilt?
And
that's what this book Sex, Wigs & Whispers is really about. Where do we
find the strength within ourselves, within our practices of spirituality,
within the world we live in to stand tall, to be proud and be a voice for
others that may need to borrow our faith?
And
it's great to have you here. Thank you for joining me here today. And thank you
for a really, really cool book which we're going to talk about here.
But
let's talk a little bit about what this is like. What is, some people don't
know what alopecia is. I mean maybe they did hear the show we did. But what was
this like for you. Is it true what I said about the guilt and about the shame
and about the fear?
Amy: Here's
the deal. I think it still exists. I think it's less than what it was when I
went through it over 20 years ago. And remember I lost all my hair at 30. So
from 13 to 30, I was taking those shots and the hair would keep coming back.
But
here's what I feel about the shame and the guilt. It's why I work so hard to
get the word out because if there's one person you can identify with that you
know you're not alone then you know you're not weird; you know you're not a
freak. You don't know what this thing is.
Alopecia
is an immune disorder. It has to do when the white blood cells think it has a
disease and it fights against itself and it results in hair loss. There's
several different types of alopecia and it goes in different stages.
Alopecia
areata are round patches which is what it starts out with. Under 20 it comes
and goes. Other times you may get your hair back, sometimes you won't. That's
why it's called the mystery disease.
Alopecia
totalis is when it moves in to the next stage where you lose all your topical
head hair. Yes, on your head. And alopecia universalis which I just went into a
few months ago at the end of writing this book from the stress I think, was
because it really was quite cathartic for me, that's the removal of all body
hair.
You
lose all pubic, arm, leg, nose, eyelashes and eyebrows. And that's intense
because that was like me starting all over again. However, because of
subliminal messages in commercials and everywhere we look, we, as women as far
back as ancient times, have been attached to our hair. Let's look at that for a
moment.
Dr. Pat: Yes.
Amy: In
ancient times, whisk and hair, they will look at that as stature, a stature of
wealth. And now they're looked on as a form of self-expression. And if a woman
can realize that number one, there's 64 million women in the US, millions more
worldwide especially in the UK, dealing with hair loss from a variety of
medical condition.
If
you could understand that the wig and extension market is a 10 billion, not
million, billion dollar market, then you're looking at almost over 35%, 40% of
women today are wearing hair for some reason on some level. Now the shame and
the guilt we got to let go of that.
The
whole reason I came out with Sex, Wigs & Whispers was because I was
inundated for years. This book took me seven years to write. And I would put it
down and I would add more, and I would go through some more stuff.
Personally,
it's ah, wait a minute. I'm still in my transformational moment. I still have
to go through with this. I was through with the book when I lost my brows and my
eyelashes. But I went oh, oh, wait a minute. This is happening. I have to write
about it.
Dr. Pat: Yes.
Amy: So I
added bye, bye brows, right?
Dr. Pat: Yes.
Amy: The guilt
and the shame still exist. However, if you realize that there is nothing to
feel guilty about, if it's a condition that there's nothing you can truly be
responsible for. Now some of alopecia can come from stress. They have been claiming
alopecia now for any form of hair loss.
But
it really is an immune disorder. That's why I always say to people get a
hormone test. Get your panels done. Get your liver panels done. Get your iron
panels done. Because if any of those things are off those [0:20:26] you, okay? My husband's
been doing hair tissue mineral testing for years.
Dr. Pat: Wow!
Amy: And you
wouldn't believe what comes up with people's minerals, because if your minerals
are off, it's just like gas on a car. You don't go anywhere or you don't go as
fast or as well.
So
I believe that there is no more guilt or shame. It's what you decide your
perception is of your hair. And if we're still attached to our hair, when I
lost mine and when a woman loses hers, I've always felt that women that go
through any type of hair loss especially alopecia, they're really special
because we have to now look so far beyond the external which is what we've been
attached to to find out what makes us tick, what makes us special, makes us
different, what makes us beautiful besides our hair. Normally you never have to
ask that question unless you're forced to or unless you become aware or
spiritual, right?
Dr. Pat: Right.
Amy: So the
guilt and the shame don't have to be if you choose it to be. Much of what this
book is about is taking something that are lemons and turning it into lemonade.
And there are some very painful moments in this book.
Dr. Pat: Yes.
Amy: There are
some very funny moments in this book.
Dr. Pat: Yes.
Amy: Which
we'll go over in this interview.
Dr. Pat: Yes.
Amy: And when
you talk about shame and guilt, I'll tell you about something that happened on
one of my dates. And I always say that you really need to know somebody a long
time. Well at least let them know your heart before you tell them about
something as personal and essential as hair loss.
Dr. Pat: Right.
Amy: Because I
think hair loss is the power. It's not losing your power. You gain something
with hair loss. Women with cancer are my hero.
Dr. Pat: Yes.
Amy: Because
they not only have to figure out how to stay here and want to fight hard to
stay here for their loved ones and their family and their friends and their job
and everything else but then they got to deal with the hair loss on top of it,
right?
Dr. Pat: Yes.
Amy: So they
have a double whammy. And are they going to really take on guilt and shame?
They're too busy surviving, honey, right? So I say let's change your perception
about hair loss. Let's look at the facts that yes, you may have some hair loss
but you're not dying. You're not dying. And when this person on a date had the
nerve to say to me, well if I kiss you, am I going to die from it? Are you
saying it's that fatal?
Dr. Pat: Right.
Amy: Now if I
was in my real emotional insecure place, I would have freaked out when he said
that. But I had gotten a handle on it. And I'd rehearsed in the mirror a lot,
my elevator speech, even if I had to bluff my way through it.
I
was not going to stop my life for my hair loss. I'd now had to pick right away
that to date, right? So I turned to him and instead of getting really defensive
and freaked out or start to eat and drink, right, what do you do when [0:23:04]
I said you know let me tell you what this is so you're aware. No, you won't die
if you kiss me and you won't die if you make love to me. And the exchange of
fluids has nothing to do with alopecia or hair loss.
Dr. Pat: Right.
Amy: And you
need to put the [0:23:19].
But in answer to your question, are there still guilt and shame. I tell you where a lot of the guilt and shame
exist are the smaller cities in the southern part of this country.
Dr. Pat: Oh, yes.
Amy: And in
Europe where they really are not aware and they don't have access to
information in as easily. It is amazing when a woman calls up and says, my wig
is going to fly off because that's her biggest fear. And I said, really? Don't
you know that wig tape, wig tape, what's wig tape? I'm like, what?
Dr. Pat: Right.
Amy: So in
answer to your question, it still exists but it's if you care for it to exist. It's
going to be up to you.
Dr. Pat: I love
what you said in the book. I think there was a point that I read in the book
where you were talking about just the same thing. And your answer was oh, my
hair. Oh, that's a boring subject. Let's talk about something more interesting.
I
think it was along those lines. And I thought you know what I'm going to use
that answer that you had right there for just about five or six other things in
my life. I loved it because right away we get into this thing where oh, wait a
minute I need to defend myself. But this was brilliant.
Amy: Yes, but
the secret is with that is you don't stop there then you move on to another
subject.
Dr. Pat: Exactly.
Amy: If you
sit on it then it ruins the moment. So if you're going to use that, it's called
broaching the subject in the book. If you're going to use that one then you
better be prepared to move on. I usually would say oh, please it's boring
subject. Will we go to the movies?
Dr. Pat: Yes,
exactly.
Amy: And really
follow up with that because if you don't, you're going to get stuck.
Dr. Pat: You're
going to get stuck. But you take people through this. And this is what I love
about what you did here in the book, Amy. First of all, many people know that I
read these books. And my listeners know that but one of the things I so love
about it is that you are giving us tools not just from a physical point of view
because you definitely do that but you're giving us emotional, spiritual and
mental tools in this book.
Amy: Yes.
Dr. Pat: Even from
the affirmations that you put forth in here, I mean I love the one affirmation
and I'm going to hope I'm going to get this right. I think it was something
like, as I challenge my fears they become more strengthened and empowered.
Something like that you write one of the affirmations in the book.
And
that is so important because what's happening in the world in so many ways and
especially around how we look our security is we're walking around with a level
of fear that I don't know that we quite know what to do with. What are you
finding?
Amy: The I'm
not good enough because I lost my hair thing. That's what I'm finding as more suppressed
and most present for me. And that's why I try to say to women we are not our
hair. However, I got to tell you I'm not comfortable going out without my hair.
I'm not. Hair feels better for me. I like hair-on, okay?
With
my clients privately at CreatedHair, when I see them privately in my studio in
Westwood in Los Angeles, I always take my hair off with my clients to let them
know they're not alone. And when I do Amy's wig workshop for free that I do on
Wednesdays here, I sit there without my hair. It's important for them to
understand that it's not the worst thing in the world.
This
book is about ladies you can have a life. You can make love. You can have
fellatio. You can give a pedicure. You can take a Jacuzzi with your man and you
can take a shower. You can work out and you can dance.
And
guess what? All you need are the tools, the right wig, the right way to
approach a date, the right way to approach your employer, the right way to
approach a hug before someone almost takes your hair with it like [00:26:52]
when I was much younger. I was getting a hug and I didn't know it. My hair
started to go with her I was like oh, my God! So if you know what to do there
is no fear.
Dr. Pat: I love
this.
Amy: The
unknown [00:27:05]
fearful.
Dr. Pat: I know. I
love this. What I love about what you're talking about is this is a message
that doesn't really brush the conversation under the carpet but brings it forth
in the carpet so that we can get to experience all the different layers of.
In
any of you out there, if you've ever been in a scenario that Amy just talked
about which I've been in where one of my bracelets got caught on somebody's
hair and oh my God. The problem with that was, Amy, both of us were laughing so
hard that we almost had to go change our underwear. That's how funny that was.
And it took 20 minutes to get untangled.
Let's
take a short break everyone. We'll be right back. Sex, Wigs & Whispers when
we come back, I'm going to give you lots of information about this, about Amy
and about how you can support others. Stay tuned. We'll be right back.
Oh,
yes. Thank you. Thank you everybody. Benny, good job on that. Amy Gibson
joining me here today to The Voice of Hair Loss. But the book is amazing. For
those of you out there I know that you are so relating to what we're talking
about today on the show. And we're just warming up here. Sex, Wigs &
Whispers, LOVE AND LIFE WITH HAIR LOSS. Amy Gibson joining me here today.
I
want to make sure that those of you out there know exactly how to find out more
about Amy and share the wealth. Pass this around. And we also have something
incredible to give away. Amy, what's the best way for people to get a copy of
the book to find out more about you. And tell us a bit about what we're giving
away here.
Amy: Okay. So
they can get the book on Amazon. Sex, Wigs & Whispers LOVE AND LIFE WITH
HAIR LOSS, that love, life and love, love and life. The second thing is
CreatedHair.com, C-r-e-a-t-e-dHair.com and you can write to me at
amy@createdhair with a question and give me day and I'll get back to you
because they get a lot of emails.
Many
years ago I was working out at a gym before there were very light-weight pieces
like the ones I designed because I have the WaterWig you swim with and other
things that are very light. So women can have active lives and have a real life
and be intimate and be able to swim and everything which I was never able to
do.
But
I was at this gym and I had a whole routine. I would obviously perspire
terribly in these heavy wigs. I would put my dry wig in a plastic bag. I would
take out. I would go into a bathroom stall and this could be maybe five minutes
in total. I would take out the dry wig. I put the wet wig in the plastic bag. I
would clean my head with towelettes. I'd spread out all my comb and my brush
and my wig tape and I had everything spread out and it would take me two to
three minutes, boom, boom, boom and I put the wig on.
Except
this one day there was no bathroom stall available. The place was packed. I had
just lost my hair so I was still in trauma because I have like a mini nervous
breakdown when I lost my hair for four days. And I just come up and started to
work out again and I said gosh no stall available. There's a handicap stall
over there with a shower curtain.
You
know what, I got this down. I'll just go in real quick. Unfortunately, as my
head was turned over and everything was on the counter there, a woman in a
wheelchair happened to pull across the shower curtain and screamed at me. Obviously
I was not handicapped like her, God forbid. But I felt handicapped to my own
right but certainly nothing like what she was dealing with. And she cussed me out and everybody saw me
bald and I was freaked out.
I
slapped my wig which I'm sure was on backwards. As I was trying to pick up
everything, everything kept falling. I grabbed everything and I ran to my car.
I cried for like an hour. I said you know one day I'm going to create two
things. Sorry.
I'm
going to create a wig that I can work out in but be really light that I can
actually leave on while I shower. It will dry naturally and quickly right back
in its shape without any maintenance styling tools. I could sit like any other
woman putting my make-up on and feel normal.
I'm
going to create some kind of bag that doesn't look like a plastic bag or a box
that's obvious but something that's going to work like a designer bag that
would have another bag inside that would hold a weather-dry wig, be completely
water-proof. That will reduce matting and freeze in hair so it'd be in good
condition. Then it will hold the other part of the bag will hold everything I
need in one place instead of spreading everything out.
Many
years later I created the ResQ Bag that just came out. R-E-S-Q Bag that just
came out that looks like a designer bag and it's been fabulous. And then many
years ago I created the first women's swim wig.
That's fiber hair. And now I have the WaterWig.
So
everything I do has an intention behind it, everything. I don't just create
stuff to create it. I created out of a need that I know is present that I would
like to have available to me. And those
needs of clients of mine that go, you know I wish I had something on
this part of the cap, for this that I have a sore head from brain surgery.
I
work with a lot of burn victims. And their head caves in on one part when
they've been burned. What do you do for that? Okay so now I created something
for burn victims so they're more comfortable. So everything I do is with an
intention. Everything.
And
so the ResQ Bag, we're giving one away today.
Dr. Pat: Yes.
Amy: It comes
in bubble gum pink. It comes in leopard. I think I have some left in black.
Dr. Pat: Okay.
Amy: And let's
give a couple of them away.
Dr. Pat: Yes,
let's do it.
Amy: Okay,
whoever raced in?
Dr. Pat: Yes.
Amy: And give
me their information. I'll be happy to send one out. For any woman who has
extensions. If they hold the extensions really well. A lot of people were funny
enough buying the mini bag that sold separately also inside. That little bag,
the wig bag that comes with the ResQ Bag is also sold separately. Those are
being sold to women that have breast prosthesis. So instead of carrying their
breast prosthesis home from the store in obvious box now it's in a really
pretty bag that no one can see.
Dr. Pat: Oh, wow!
And this is a beautiful gift, a beautiful, beautiful gift. And for those of you
out there, many of us know people that are going through whatever they're going
through and understand what the journey might be like for them. But until you
actually go through it you know this is what the gift of having this kind of
challenge does. It brings us to the forefront just like it's bringing Amy to
the forefront to help other people and to really do it in a way where we're
honouring who each of us are.
Let's
open up the phone lines, doing it to the first caller one at a time. This is
what I love about this. 1-800-930-2819. Mr. Benny will get your call. We'll
take your information and then we'll give another bag away as we're doing this.
You
know this is really interesting, right? This conversation. And I want to talk
about it for a little bit in the context of what we go through and the
challenges in life. Some of us went through tough childhood. You and I were
chit-chatting a little bit about that.
Amy: Yes.
Dr. Pat: Things
that we would never think in a million years we'd be on air talking about,
right? But here we are and we are talking about that. I want to ask you this
question. I am probably going to skip the break coming up here.
I
would love to know from you what some of these challenges, what you have
learned from them if you have learned. Some of the challenges in your life
because we're talking right now about hair loss but that doesn't mean that's
the only thing. They'll look at folks like you and like me and they'll think
wait a minute these two have got it going on. For sure they're going to look at
Amy and say wow! You are absolutely stunning.
Amy: Really?
But if I had it going on do you think I'd still be emotional like I was just
now?
Dr. Pat: That's
exactly why I'm asking you these questions.
Amy: Okay, so
this book, Sex, Wigs & Whispers is very cathartic for me. I was actually
very surprised writing it how much stuff came up for me. I thought oh, God I
thought I was done with that.
I
started my company never thinking I was going to go into this. I was producing at that time. And I hurt my
back and all my discs collapsed and I was given a 50% chance of ever walking
again. This lower part of the extremities of my body could not hold up. So I
had to be lifted out of bed and put back into bed until I could learn how to
walk again.
And
during that time, everything I was doing at production I would get a deal and I
would fall apart. I would get a deal with a studio I would fall apart. But yet,
the left side of me the phone side of the bed, I kept getting phone calls from
my hair loss support groups asking me questions. Oh Amy hasn't been here but we
wanted to get a wig and this happened. I have a date with this guy. What do I
tell him? I have to go to work and my boss looks at me from above on the
computer and there's big light there.
All
these questions and it got to be so busy that I realized oh, geez! I'm sitting
here. I better charge $15 a phone call. I would talk for maybe 20 minutes. And
that's not so busy. But I realized wait a minute I got it but I kept asking God
why are you having me sit still like this? This is the most pain I've ever felt.
I want to literally die. Take me. If you're going to take me I don't do pills.
I don't do drugs but find a way to take me because I can't deal with this pain.
And
then when I got well and I started walking again and treatments that were given
that I was out of pain, I started going in my car with wigs in my car to go to all of the
cancer centers I was associated with and [00:39:53].
I
would take orders on ready-made wigs. Then I would go to my wig makers and I'd
say I want you to teach me because I want to do this for women. I think this is
what I'm supposed to do. I really got it. I kept asking okay Louise, so I'm
reading about you. Please tell me what this is supposed to mean.
Then
I got so busy that I bought in to my one-bedroom apartment. Then I got so busy
I built a studio. But during the time that I was stuck in bed I had an
overwhelming urge to make eyebrows. Don't ask me why. I had only $11,000 to my
name and I used every bit to bring in this guy to help me design eyebrow. And I
never did anything with them.
And
when I start to walk again and get my business going, I said I want to put those
eyebrows on some like home-shopping or something and I couldn't find glue. And
someone told me about a glue guy that to this day I had not met. And we would
talk on the phone.
Six
months into it he said so you keep on telling me you have this idea for some
kind of swim wig. I said yes. I cut my napes off my wigs for years. I don't
feel that women need to have all that material. When a man feels the back of
her neck when he's going to kiss her it's the biggest fear. I don't want him
feeling it. I always cut my nape short and I have a design that nobody has.
He
said well [00:41:01]
is the largest company in the world and they're in Vegas right now.
You should go hang with them. I said I don't hang. If they want to meet me they
can sign the paper work and they can fly me up there or they can come down
here.
And
several weeks later someone from their company came in to LA and long story
short they put up all the money for the first women swim wig. Now if I had not made
those eyebrows five years later I would not have been looking for the glue and
would not have been led to what I'm doing. So it's an interesting thing, right?
Dr. Pat: It is. It
is fascinating. But what you're actually talking about is really beyond the
idea of how do we go from point A to point B.
Amy: And Okay,
let me go into that for a moment. Let's talk about somebody losing their hair,
okay?
Dr. Pat: Yes.
Amy: So I'm
going to go to a place that you notice one spot. I'm saying one spot is not
enough to send you over the hill yet. It could be stress. It could be alopecia.
It could be nutritional. It could be some liver enzyme. It could be low iron.
It could be a number of things but don't get crazy.
Now
for those of you that are having more hair loss there is a way around this
because there are incredible things in our path that were never out before.
There are little top pieces you can clip in. They just add some volume.
What
I'm saying is life is not over because of hair loss. You can walk through this.
You can get the tools if you have the tools for anything for any type of
challenge. If you have the tools you could overcome the challenge. If we don't
have the tools you're going blindly trying to figure out your way and that's
what I had to do for years. Now let's look at somebody that has complete
baldness.
Dr. Pat: Yes.
Amy: I felt
like my sexuality and my sensuality had been stripped which is what most women
feel. And then we have to say wait a minute I'm not my hair. But I sort of am
because that is my sensual look. Okay, well you're going to get a wig that
could look and feel like you. Obviously, we know we're doing a created hair but
there are many good people out there. I can certainly lead you into the right
direction if we're too far for you, where you're at, let me try to find someone
within your area.
But
when there were no alternative there are tons of alternatives now. And the book
really takes you to how to handle any situation including any styling tips. So
that the main thing I've realized is if you can look in a mirror and whatever
you're seeing in the mirror looks and feels energetically like you. And it looks
like who you know you to be. That's 90% of the challenge.
The
other 10% is for you to go inside and say wait a minute I may have this but I'm
not dying from it. And I got to be grateful. I would keep reminding myself God-willing,
thank you, God my mom let rest in peace would say to me you know what? You're
really lucky. I'd say I'm lucky? I hate God for doing this to me. She said
don't you ever say that. She said you've got two eyes. You've two breasts. You
can hear and you can walk. You're luckier than half the women that are out
there. How dare you not be thankful for those things?
And
when you change your perspective you change your reality. It's all down to way
you're looking at the hair loss. If you look at it like you're a victim and
you're never going to go anywhere which is what happens with so many women and
they stop dating they stop socializing. All of a sudden their whole life
becomes a hermit. That's why I wrote the book because you don't have to be a
hermit. You can literally do anything like any other normal woman. All you need
to know is how. Does that give you any set of answer to what you needed?
Dr. Pat: Yes. And
here's what I love about this because for me as I'm listening to you, it's such
a powerful message for women right now. So very important to be hearing you,
Amy come from such a place of hard opening, authenticity, because I know.
I
know that we hear from our listeners all the time. And they will talk to us
about a show they've heard whether it's this show live or whether it's somebody
in Australia that will hear this show next week. We hear from them back about
something they're hearing you say that goes beyond what you and I could
possibly even imagine to give somebody strength to get up the next morning and
feel halfway good about themselves. See
and that's what I love about your passion and your purpose.
Amy: But our
hair loss does not define us. Our hair does not define us. Our spirit does. And
when you get in touch with your essence nothing and no one, no one can take
that away or duplicate that. Nobody can do that.
That's
the secret with any type of challenge is to go wait a minute I'm more than
this. You read in the book. You know that I was molested for seven years and I
was told as a kid you're stupid. You're never going to amount to anything. You
have a slight dyslexia. You're stupid. You're stupid. You're stupid.
It
took me so long to overcome the fact that not only was I not a black hole which
is what I felt like so much of the time but that I was a woman. And you know
what? I don't care what you think about my hair or about my abilities. I know
what my spirit is. And I know that this person inside me is not about my hair
that I'm connected to it.
What
makes me special and for every woman is that every woman is special. Every
woman, there's not one woman that can be duplicated. What they bring to their
forefront and when they change their perception about their life, when they go
you know what? Let me look at this hair thing for a minute. Okay, this is
really horrible. I feel ugly. I feel so ugly. Most women feel ugly. When I lost
my brows and my eyelashes I felt ugly again. I felt like an alien. I really
did. I had to go wait a minute, wait a minute. I'm going to learn how to draw
my brows on.
I
went to Nordstrom and I prayed to my mom and I said and I said God I got two
hours between clients. Mom, I can't deal with this. I'm so good at drawing my
clients' brows. I can't get the hang of it myself. And I just can't go out like
this. I lost them in weeks.
And
I sat and I said please just point me to the right person and I walk in and
this guy out of nowhere comes up to me and it was crowded. There was no one
available and she goes can I help you. And she wasn't dressed like a normal
Nordstrom sales person. I said I'm sorry I really need somebody who knows about
brows. She hands me her card. She goes I'm Christine, I'm a Nordstrom's brows
specialist. And I felt okay.
So
when you reach out there is something to learn in the story. When you reach out
of being in the victim consciousness, when you say I'm not going to be a
victim, let me get proactive. The minute you become proactive is the minute you
become successful with any type of hair loss. You have to stay out from being a
victim.
The
only way to stay out of it is to get knowledge. The only way to stay out of
that is not only to get knowledge but then be proactive with that knowledge.
Not only are you going to read about it but now you're going to go a wig store
and you're going to ask the questions that I told you to ask. And you're going
to shop for a wig the way I told you to be aware of. And you're going to know that
you can't look at the color inside the store. You have to look at it in natural
light so you have a better chance of getting something that looks like you. So
that in the end, it's not so emotional. It's not so overwhelming, right?
Dr. Pat: Yes. Yes,
and one of the things I'm really struck
by about the book is It's not just about
what you're sharing in the book but it's how you're sharing it. It is so being
shared from a place of vibrancy and thriving.
Amy: Thank
you.
Dr. Pat: That it
is one of these reads that when you pick up the book, not only do we feel what
it's like emotionally to experience this but all of the ranges of emotion. But
there's a level of empowerment in the way that you've written this book where
it's almost as if it's a no non-sense. This is how you do it and boy, let's go
dance and go to the beach. Let's go to
the dance. Let's go to the beach. Let's take a shower. This is how you do it.
And that's what I'm loving about this.
Amy: You do not
have to stop your life, ladies. You do not have to stop your life.
Dr. Pat: Right.
For me, what I love about this I think you picked this book up and folks, let
me just tell you, whether you're losing your hair or not you're going to learn
how to live a really joyful, fun life. Because I'm looking at some of these
stuff and I'm saying to myself wait a minute. I don't even do this stuff. Amy,
this is like you saying to folks wait a minute. It's not about living a
mediocre life. It's living a vibrant life.
Amy: Right.
Dr. Pat: That's
what I'm sensing right here with this.
Amy: It is. It
is and not that there aren't challenges in that. Even the other day because I'm
going to the whole hormone stuff, right? And I'm very defensive about it. And
so my husband said to me the other day, "Honey, before you go in for the
shoot [00:50:06].
I said what? And I said we are not having this conversation.
It
reminds me that we are not perfect. We are imperfect in a perfect way, right?
So for any woman that's out there that says oh, my God I am never going to be
able to live with a man. I have a boyfriend. How do I tell him? Is he going to
run?
Is
there going to be a way that I could ever walk against the wind and not worry about
my wig showing up and flying up? Is there a way that I can enjoy and not be
aware of my wig 12 hours a day when I'm wearing it? Absolutely. Is there a way
that I can approach my family without freaking them out about my hair loss?
Absolutely. If you take an approach like that, you will never ever be a victim
to this condition.
Dr. Pat: Wow! I so
thank you for doing what you do and joining us here today. Can we take a
minute? I know the hours go so quickly. Can we take a minute? And again let
folks know about how they can get a copy of the book. Let them know your
website and how they can find out more.
I
would just want to say to folks, if you go to the website, look at what people
are saying and how grateful they are for everything that you're doing, Amy. So
go ahead and let folks know the best way to find out more about you and about get a copy of the book.
Amy: You're so
sweet. I appreciate that. It's on Amazon. Sex, Wigs & Whispers by Amy Gibson.
Love and Life with Hair Loss. And there's sexwigsandwhispers.com if you want to
read a little bit about it.
Dr. Pat: Yes.
Amy: We've got
some phenomenal reviews from people who bought the book but I didn't realize
until I went on the other day. I cried when I read them all. Wow! I'm so glad
I'm making a difference. And then the CreatedHair, C-R-E-A-T-E-Dhair.com is
where we give you all kinds of emotional support. And great wigs and great
dolls to look at and all kinds of ways and information on insurance and
reimbursement and cancer and cancer hair loss, all the things you need to know.
So again, you're in control. It's not in control of you.
Dr. Pat: Awesome.
I love that I get to spend time with you, Amy. Thank you so much and please let
me know how I can support you. I have one last question.
Amy: Yes,
please.
Dr. Pat: What's
your personal message? What would you like to leave us with today?
Amy: I think I
said it throughout that hair loss doesn't stop you from being the woman that
you are. It makes you a deeper woman. You don't have to stop your life. When
you have the tools you can do anything.
And
again most of all I really believe that when we stay grateful to the things
that we do have, the things that we don't have diminish a bit. And when we take
that perspective even though it's really hard when you know your life is
falling apart or that your looks are not there, certainly I've been rejected by
men. I told them too soon or I made some mistakes along the way and you learn
from that.
But
I think over all the message I want to leave with every lady listening that maybe dealing with hair loss is it's
okay. Your not alone, number one. There are terrific resources. There are
terrific support groups. If you go to National Alopecia Foundation, National Alopecia
Areata Foundation, naaf.org, there's support groups all over the country that
you can join.
You
can certainly reach me at amy@createdhair. I do Skype calls three times a week,
three hours a day all over the world. And I'm available so if I'm not on the
road, I'll try to certainly answer as quickly as possible. And most of all I
think that you have to realize that hair loss does not define who we are.
Again, our essence and our spirit is who speak through us.
Amy: And it's
all about keeping our hearts singing and not letting our voice die from
something just from hair loss. You can't. And when you look at it in a bright
perspective you get through it.
Dr. Pat: I love
it.
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